Hello readers.I'm back here once more.November is coming to an end and one more month would be the 'O' level result.Although it was only two weeks ago that the 'O' level ended,I feel it was already months that we are having this break! It could be that I could not keep myself occupied with things.

It's really boring!

Some of you have forgotten me.Should I be happy? I have no clue too. I may be expecting too much from you guys.

Since I have no job yet,I still throw it away.My life is not in order anymore.Trust me.It's terrible!

As you guys might have known,tensions have rise between two opposing parties that carries different ideologies within an island.Some would say it's a civil war.Honestly,there are many other countries supporting each side.How could it even be a civil war?!

My purpose here is not to criticize them.

We as people from distant countries should never take this privilege in life for granted.It's true that our own homeland is not experiencing such turbulence and didn't live in fear.However,we must always be prepared to combat any form of terrorism because when we take things for granted,things tend to happen.It always does.

In life,we humans could never satisfy ourselves.There are some that wanted more and a few that wanted less.They would even go to the extent and argue that it was for survival and economic growth.

War is a terrible thing.Or rather conflicts.We may not compromise at first.However by being in one,we would involve the people around us.The one that we loved and care the most.

Nowadays,there have been a lot of cases.Would you imagine if someone from the society would step up and help to stop the conflict from getting worse,wouldn't the number of casualties be significantly reduce? Maybe it would and maybe it wouldn't but it's the thoughts that counts.

Our society doesn't have that type of people because we were pampered too much with the good things in life.We tend to believe that there are always people that would come and defend us when we are in need.

Let me share a story here.

Once,there were a group of soldiers fighting against guerrillas that had advanced warfare.The soldiers were outnumbered as those guerrillas had managed to outwit them despite when they had the upper-hand at first.They called in for back-up.They waited and each time one of their comrades dies trying to escape from the sight of these guerrillas.Eventually,the reinforcement didn't came.They abandon the troops.The remaining of the soldiers either became prisoners or some were entirely wiped out.

The possible reason for these reinforcement to not arrive because they felt it was a waste of time as the chances of winning was declining to a near 0% and there were only a few soldiers left.

Or it was a waste of resources.

This shows that in times like this,we should never rely on things for extra help.Instead they could have put their heads together and use their strengths together.In this life,help wouldn't come easily as seen on televisions and so on.We have to depend on ourselves to survive.

Have you ever thought.

When war is officially declared,would you scramble and find your friends?

Or find shelter for your own safety?

Many would choose the second option.

Hmph.How naive can we be..I'm not trying to force you to change here.This is a reminder we shouldn't rely on people too much and when they didn't deliver as they should,we blame them.

We love to blame on people except ourselves.

Hello readers.I'm here once more to write down these thoughts that I've been holding on since yesterday night.Since I've made that previous post below this,I've been thinking a lot lately and apparently I could not sleep too.

I wouldn't want to talk about that past.All I can say that right now.I still feel discriminated.I know that I don't really stand out among my friends.And I also know that once school is over,I am nothing.I have no authority to do anything.

You guys can do whatever you all want on me but deep down I know I will never give up even if I have to try a thousand times than my other friends.I will never back down.This is my will to live and purpose!

Apparently,that is my sunlight that I've been searching for too.

I will believe in myself even till the day I die.

Hello readers.It's 1.35am here and I feel so bored right now.No jobs.I just slack away my time which I used to consider precious once.Today's topic would be "Hello".

Hello.
We have met.
5 years you would say.

Was it worthwhile?
Was it memorable?

Did we manage to mature overtime?
Did we accomplish our resolution?
Did we find our true calling in life?
Did we succeed?

How far will we go?
How well did we do?

Will these memories last?
Will our friendship still be there after we part our ways?
Will we able to compromise once more?
Will we trust people?

Are there still hope?
Are there still chances?
Are there still honesty?
Are there still justice or rather fairness?

We tend to ask ourselves this questions overtime because we would know that one day our time would come to an end in a school.Some of us want to succeed while some of us just want to get away from our school's life.What was the reason?

There are many reasons.Bullies.Discriminative actions.Misjudged.Biased.

Those are a few of which I experienced in the past.Not in my secondary life but in that previous school.I only had a friend that survived till now for 8 years.I'm glad I would say.

This time our secondary life is ending as we are graduating into a Tertiary Institution or Junior College or Millenia Institute.We are going our separate ways and we are wondering those question above.

Sometimes we have found a friend.Someone who understood us or rather able to accept for who we are or rather tolerate with our attitude.That type of person would never last because in life, this is what people always think.

To survive,we have to make use of them.

Or

To make through in this school,we have to mix with the right people.

It's biased and discriminative and a pain but we cannot stop them for doing what they want.They chose to be that way.All we can do is being cautious.Even if they mixed with us,just don't get too caught up with the situation.

In the end,they would pursue their own career,dreams and ambitions and leave us behind.They would even cut our line of communication.We were fooled.From there,we don't beat ourselves down.We stand up.Head held high,standing as someone stronger.

For me,I'm not really concern with such people.They do what they want.It's their life.I have my own flaw but I have no point sharing it with people.Sometimes I don't realize I'm self-centered too.I have made up my mind.I do not wish to share my problems with people and be hurt once more.

Well,what you guys did back then did shatter my whole self.And I was afraid to stood up against you all.Even if I did,I was outnumbered.No one bothered to help me.They laugh,mock and insulted me.At such a young age,I was already tainted with those words and so was my childhood.I lived in fear,never did overcoming it.

I should just forget it you say?

Since it's the past.

Yeah,well those actions are too treacherous to be forgotten.It's a nightmare.And I have never hold grudges.I would never will.

I just do not wish to experience such bitterness anymore.

Mock me if you want.

Talk behind my back.

I'm amazing in my own way so don't try to bring it down.

End.

Well,thanks for reading. Stay tune. Finally,this is the last entry I'm gonna make about my past.I'm going to let it go.

I'm glad again :)

Hello Readers.As mentioned above,today's topic would be on "Emotions".Before I continue,I would like to rant that I still have no job up till today.It's a bore! Seriously. I had play games like no tomorrow.

Emotions.How do you define it? There are many emotions that expresses for who we are and what we are feeling at that moment of time.It could be in a simple situation that brought about happiness or a complicated one which spur up frustration.There are times when we lost someone we held so dearly,we were depressed.And there are those days when a person tries to control everything about what we do,ending up we develop a sense of hatred.

There are many emotions that could describe a person's character.Today,I will list down a few.

Happiness - This is an emotion that everyone desire for. It could be happiness in a relationship or happiness for life.We always fixed our minds by wanting those good stuff in life,positive things I'd say.And sometimes people do take this emotion for granted resulting them to regret of their actions.For me,happiness is out there but it would never last.And we should never keep something that could bring joy to others.We should share it.

Sadness - Many people dislike this emotion.Well, the negativity would just flow right in to you and all sort of things come into mind.Suicide,Murder,Emo-ing and so on.When we are experiencing this,it is always best to stop whatever we are doing because it would definitely affect the quality of the work.This is tough to go through alone and sometimes we just have to.When there are someone out there who allow you to share your burden with them,let them.Your mind will be at ease.

Anger - Everyone loves to throw things around.Kicking for example.It is a way to show how angry we are.Sometimes people tend to do things that could really pisses other people off.By possessing such emotion,it could also encourage certain strength that we have bottled up for quite sometime to gush out just like that.It is always not safe to be around those that are angry.It is also best to allow them to cool their heads off.Sometimes they also tend to say things that they didn't meant to.

Frustration - All of us wants a perfect result,presentation or friends.Although,it's impossible to achieve that is when we will get to be frustrated.We will throw all sorts of words to ourselves.Hopeless,Useless or maybe just a burden to someone else life.To achieve something in life,we have to work hard for it.By working hard is the amount of effort we put.And by the amount,it's the quality of effort that we put.It's a tedious and tiring process but it's worth the sacrifice.

Hatred - Sometimes we love to use these few words, " I hate you" or maybe we develop it overtime.In this lifetime,we should never develop hatred against another person.This life is short.So,we should live to our fullest and enjoy while we can.When we hate someone,we began to despise them.Eventually this would develop into something more complicated.It could be a person knocking down a friend of yours.And you despise that person as it was a hit-and-run and evidently that friends of yours was the only one who understood you completely.And we would say "I would never forgive you" or "You shall regret this". Hatred tends to give us a one-sided action rather than being fair.

Love - This is something that people love to talk about.It's an emotion alright.This is my opinion on it.When we love someone,we held them dearly.We sacrifice our time for them.We respect their limits.We have our own limits.We know where we stand and would not cross that line.Love is a complicated process in which there could be misunderstandings and not just a few but tons of it.Jealousy would comes into play.Sometimes people makes things so complicated that they would end up regretting it later.

Okay.That's it.It's pretty dry.I have no idea what I'm blogging about.This is life.And we should stop whining about how cruel it is.

One last thing,we should always be honest about how we are feeling because we would never want to tell people that we are not feeling what they thought we are.You get it?

Next Post:"Hello"

Signing Off.

Hello Readers.I'm back here once more.The holidays are pretty much a bore.Well honestly, I can't believe I'm saying this too.When we have studies,we wanted holidays.And when we have holidays,we wanted studies.Human being is always hard to please.

Anyway,above are some pictures that I found on my friend's facebook album page,with her permission of course.Each picture do hold a unique significance,representing from different events.This event are the one that made us remember it for our life.It's true that I said I wouldn't cherish these memories in my previous post.But hey,who am I kidding! Memories are meant to be treasured whether we want it or not.From these memories,there is always an experience in it.We gain it or we don't and if we do,we learn something new.

Everyone of us wanted to create a special memories between them.It could be friends,BGR,families and so on and forth.Usually some of them would ask,why bother? It won't last forever anyway.Or maybe it's just a waste of time. Honestly,this is what I usually say so I'm a bit guilty :X

Moving on,I have finally come to an understanding that pictures do speaks a thousand words. As someone who wants to discover the truth,I must take in consideration of every minor details.Sometimes we tend to get motivated in doing stuff that we like.Passionate I guess.Well back to the point.It's important to cherish every moments that we have in this life because we might never know when we would just die.I'm not trying to curse or anything but we might never know.

Last but not least. A song entitled "Like Crazy" by 2AM recently released. They are a Korean boy band ballad genre group. The song is on my sidebar under the music player. I will be posting the lyrics here and the video would be at the bottom.

Korean:
아직 가슴이 아픈 건 참아도 눈물이 나는 건

입으론 잊었다 말해도 나조차 속여보려고 해도
널 잊지 못해서 그런 거라서

미친 듯이 눈물이 나 이러다 나 정말 무슨 일 날 거 같아
보란 듯이 잘 살아 보고 싶은데 어떡해 나 계속 눈물이 나

무슨 잘못을 한 건지
뭐가 너를 떠나게 한 건지

이유를 알 수가 없어서 그런 내가 너무나 분해서
잊어보려 해도 결국 너라서

미친 듯이 눈물이 나 이러다 나 정말 무슨 일 날 거 같아
보란 듯이 잘 살아 보고 싶은데 어떡해 나 계속 눈물이 나

정말 이유는 모르겠지만 내가 뭐라도 널 섭섭하게 했겠지
다 니가 맞으니까 내가 틀린 거니까
돌아만 와줘 이 눈물을 멈춰줘

미친 듯이 눈물이 나 이러다 나 정말 무슨 일 날 거 같아
보란 듯이 잘 살아 보려 했는데 눈물만 나 계속 미친 듯이

Romanization:
Ajig gaseumi apeun guhn chamado noonmoori naneun guhn

Eebeuron eejuhtda marhaedo najocha soqyuhboryuhgo haedo
Nuhr eejji mothaesuh geuruhn guhrasuh

Michin deushi noonmoori na eeruhda na juhngmal mooseun eel nar guh gata
Boran deushi jar sara bogo shipeundeh uhdduhghae na gyesok noonmoori na

Mooseun jarmoseur han guhnji
Mwuhga nuhreur dduhnageh han guhnji

Eeyooreur ar sooga uhbsuhsuh geuruhn naega nuhmoona boonhaesuh
Eejuhboryuh haedo gyurgook nuhrasuh

Michin deushi noonmoori na eeruhda na juhngmal mooseun eel nar guh gata
Boran deushi jar sara bogo shipeundeh uhdduhghae na gyesok noonmoori na

Juhngmar eeyooneun moreugettjiman naega mwuhrado nuhr suhbsuhbhageh haetgetji
Da niga mateunigga naega teullin guhnigga
Doraman wajwuh ee noonmooreur mumchwujwuh

Michin deushi noonmoori na eeruhda na juhngmal mooseun eel nar guh gata
Boran deushi jar sara boryuh haetneundeh noonmoorman na gyesok michin deushi

English:
My heart still hurts, I can't hold in my tears

Even though I said I had already forgotten, even if I try to lie to myself
Because I still can't forget you

My tears falling like crazy, at this rate, what am I going to do
I want to live proudly, what to do, my tears keep falling

What did I do wrong
Why did we separate

I don't know the reason, I'm so furious
No matter how hard I try to forget, in the end it's still you

My tears falling like crazy, at this rate, what am I going to do
I want to live proudly, what to do, my tears keep falling

Even though I really don't know the reason, no matter what I do will make you mad, right
Because you've always right, and I'm always wrong
Let's go back, stop my tears from falling

My tears falling like crazy, at this rate, what am I going to do
I want to live proudly, my tears keep falling like crazy

It's a good song.It describes one of my friend and apparently me.I'm not gonna say who it is.Figure it out.And don't ask me about it xD I still have doubts on taking pictures :X

Hello readers.Well today had been an interesting journey.Apparently I went out to NYP.It was a request from my old classmate from Primary School.So,I just went without knowing the knowledge of it.

I know this is leading to nowhere.Everything in this life is tempting.However,I've discovered every aspect of your life about the words you are saying.And I had managed to look beyond what you are trying to tell us.In other words,I've solved it.So,don't bother trying to trick me.

There is always a truth in everything.Be it a small or big matter.That truth is always a light that is shining down from above as Justice would prevail.We may be conceal in the darkness but we have to trust the thing that we have which is our instincts.It would lead us to the light.And that light would reveal everything.It's true we may have to give up on certain opportunities but it's worth it in saving our life.Without knowing any background,we should never do something beyond our will.Probably,you may not be those typical person. But hey,people have their ways around it.

Well,I am not easily fooled.And what you said just now is seriously rude.Have you no basic courtesy?

And right now I still have no job.This is just plain terrible.I met with my conductor and he told me I should just work in a field which I dislike as a last resort.Well,I agree.We all need to survive on something right.

"There is Always One and Only Truth!"

Hello Readers! I'm back from a long months of absence due to my O level and all I can say is that I would not be leaving any regrets. At first it was really hard to stop doing what I usually do which is blogging but after months of discipline,I believe it was worth it.

For now,I'm just seeking for a job till the next school term and it really depends how many aggregate I would get for the Os.Just right before the Os, I took study leave from school.It wasn't really an official one but most of us just declare it by our own.In life,we have to take some risks and sometimes it involves putting our reputation on the line.The result would speak for itself when it comes out on Mid-January next year and hoping to see it would paid off.

Now,I don't want to put my hopes too high on O level.I have other priority in life right? I hope so. After the Os, I was clueless. And well let me talk about the Prelims.

During the Prelim period,it was a tough and lonely journey for me.To many of you it isn't but I took the step alone. I refrain from talking with other people and sometimes even stop socializing. I only remembered I talk to only one of my friend.I've no clue either.Right let's get back on track.

The O's was finished yesterday and now we are celebrating or doing something else in life.For me, I want to do what I like best or rather achieve my goals before next year. So here I come!

It has been a great journey with all of my friends and I would uh remember it. I wouldn't say cherish though. Hahaha. Right. Now to write something:

It was my fault.And it would always be.I am for what I am.You can't force me to do things that I don't want.It's like asking a baby to mend a car.Okay maybe I'm exaggerating.The world has its beauty and nature allow us to be within it.We are the one who tried to change that and do things in our own way.In the end,we destroy it.It's the same.When you ask someone to do things that they don't want.In the end,they will be apart from you and the relationship is endless.

But

That's not my point here for this post.

When two worlds collide,it's something to be happy about.Now is the time for us to have some breather.And for me,I believe I have to let everyone go.I have lost faith.Yes.My faith.I don't know to who.But,when we do meet on the streets and I did not acknowledge you,I wasn't being arrogant.I had simply forgotten you.Even if we were friends for 5 years.I had to do it.Don't ask me why.Because I don't know it myself.This is the right time for me just to be nothing in everyone's life.

I'm sorry.I'm being selfish.Yeah I am.I am always like this.

Forget me.